It’s Friday and we know that means many of you are planning your weekend activities (read: deciding whether you have enough money to afford to go to the “gentlemen’s club” this weekend or if you’ll have to settle for the strip club with the chunky girls and relaxed “touching policy.” So we decided to take a break from chronicling hot stripper mugshots and bad strip club commercials, and instead dream up our list of The 10 Fictional Strip Clubs That Would Be The Most Fun To Visit.
10. The Eager Beaver
The strip club featured in the movie Striptease had Demi Moore working the pole (insert your own Ashton Kutcher joke here) and that is reason enough for it to make the list, but this club was actually packed with other excitement as well. Strippers playing with snakes, a “host” with enormous boobs and bad jokes…this club had everything but a decent plot.
9. Cheetah’s Topless Club
This is based on a real strip club in Las Vegas, but we want to go to the fictional version that was featured in Showgirls. Why? Because in that version of this club you can convince a former Saved By The Bell star to give you a lapdance and sleep with you just by promising to give her a gig as a dancer in some gay Vegas stage show.
8. Grand Theft Auto Strip Clubs
We admit that we don’t play Grand Theft Auto, but from what we hear there’s a lot of “extras” going on in the strip clubs featured in the game and we fully support that.
7. The Player’s Club
There’s no better urban strip club we can imagine than the Player’s Club featured in the movie of the same name. Not only does the club feature hot women, illegal activity, and the occasional gunfight, but it’s also got an Oscar winner (Jamie Foxx) on the turntables.
6. The Strip Club In Powder Blue
Never heard of Powder Blue? It’s the movie that stars Jessica Biel as a stripper. We want to go to any club in which Jessica Biel is stripping and so do you.
5. Porky’s
What happens in a backwoods strip joint in Florida, stays in a backwoods strip joint in Florida.
4. The Rhino
You may not be familiar with The Rhino, but that’s because you’re probably not familiar with the movie Zombie Strippers, which starred porn star Jenna Jameson as a…(wait for it)…zombie stripper. And who wouldn’t want to go to a zombie strip club? Especially one with zombies that looked like Jenna Jameson.
3. Chippendales
The only male strip club to make this list would be the Chippendales club that auditioned Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze in a classic Saturday Night Live sketch. Now we’re not gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but we would go to a male strip club to see Farley dance in a second if we had the opportunity.
2. The Titty Twister
The strip club that is the backdrop to the movie From Dusk Til Dawn is located on the Mexican border and features strippers that look like Salma Hayek and happen to be vampires. Just like Mexico itself, this club is packed with an equal amount to love and fear.
1. The Bada Bing
We know that the Bada Bing featured in The Sopranos was based on an actual Bada Bing strip club, but that’s not the one we want to visit. We could care less about another Jersey roadside T&A joint. We want to go watch some ladies shake their boobies while sipping drinks with Tony Soprano and his crew. Any strip club where you can see hot women, listen to commentary from Paulie Walnuts, and occasionally whack a guy that’s annoying you has to be considered the best of all time.
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