WIAABPWA (Why I Am Annoyed By People Who Abbreviate)
It all started about 10 years ago.
I was living in New York City at the time and had been set up on a blind date by a friend. Blind dates are generally a disaster, but this one had started off rather well. She was cute, seemed to be normal, and I was just about to mentally thank my friend for the set up when something tragic occurred.
She asked me if I was hungry and when I told her that I was, she responded, “Do you want to grab some sush?” I paused. Surely, she meant to say sushi with an “I” and accidentally swallowed it. I decided to give her another shot. Again, she responded, “Oh, yeah. I love sush.” A cold shiver shot down my spine and it was at that moment that I decided to abbreviate the date.
Since that night, I have come in contact with all of kinds of “abbreviators” who say things like “ridic” and “’tude” and “late.” They’re the same people who think that tilting their baseball cap slightly to the side is a fresh, original take on wearing a hat. It’s not. It looks retarded and if I remember correctly, those are the people who ride on the short bus. So, I can only hope that in this day and age of texting and instant messaging people remember that short isn’t necessarily the cool choice. Just look at Capri pants.
LOL.
Mike Bender is a screenwriter who enjoys awkward moments and actually seeks them out. He has recently written about the Gay Seat and a letter to the bathroom drunk guy. His column run every other Thursday.
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