Geniuses are idiots. Or at least they have shitty taste in television.
Over at the Fancast blog, they got the idea to ask an actual genius what he considered the smartest TV shows of all time. They turned to Jim Werdell, Chairman of MENSA International and things went horribly, horribly wrong. His list, in no particular order:
1. M*A*S*H – It had smart repartee and was so much more than a comedy.
2. Cosmos (with Carl Sagan) – Sagan was able to communicate something extremely complicated to the layman and do it well, and that’s unusual for a scientist at his level.
Although the television series is nowhere near as biting as the movie (Spearchucker Jones? Really?), M*A*S*H was a smart, funny show with the Korean War as a backdrop. No complaints from me.
As for Cosmos, Carl Sagan was a pioneering astronomer and astrochemist, and 99% of us had no idea what he was talking about half the time. Who are we to question his inclusion on this list? A little-known fact about Sagan is that he was a confirmed marijuana smoker. So basically, Carl Sagan made it his life’s work to get high and look at the stars. That’s genius.
3. CSI – The way they use science to solve their programs is intriguing to viewers.
Let’s be honest here, Jim. People aren’t interested in the science behind CSI. They like the gross-out aspect and the gimmicky camera tricks blended into the classic police procedural format that wraps everything up within one hour. Interestingly enough, my friend Wendell, an attorney, told me that there has been a CSI effect with jury trials. It seems that years of watching shows like this has convinced the average American that there has to be some sort of brain matter or semen splattered around every crime scene, which just isn’t the case. So, you could make the argument that CSI is actually making American dumber.
4. House – Again, it’s high level type of show; it’s the personality that makes it a winner, plus it deals with science.
It’s ER with a smart-assed British guy. Hugh Laurie’s a really talented guy, but just because a show throws around medical jargon that nobody watching it even understands, doesn’t make it smart.
5. West Wing – you had to pay attention to stay up with it. The repartee was fast and furious and you needed a fairly high level intelligence to keep up with it.
For a genius, this guy uses the word “repartee” way too much. Especially since the repartee on the West Wing was some of the most unbelievable, annoying dialogue in the history of television. I’m on record as not being a fan of the Aaron Sorkin school of dialogue where every single character has the perfect retort at all times. It’s like Dawson’s Creek for adults. Guess what, Jim? White House staffers aren’t smart mouthing their bosses all day long. Also, I have to deduct points for trying to make working in politics seem exciting and sexy.
6. Boston Legal – It’s primarily because of the characters. The story lines are okay, but the characters are incredible and the writers give them great dialogue.
I demand that the folks at MENSA begin impeachment hearings immediately. The story lines are silly and implausible and the dialogue is insufferable. I love the fact that ABC and David E. Kelly jumped the shark with The Practice and not only kept going, they spun this piece of shit off and kept on water skiing.
7. All in the Family – The show dealt with social issues before its time and was on the forefront of trying to show people’s feelings, beliefs and the complexities of personality, in both a serious and comedic way.
One of the smartest, bravest television shows of all time.
8. Frasier – The repartee was sensational; the main characters were very good. Even though they portrayed people who were likely of high intelligence, they also showed their weaknesses.
God damn it. There’s that word again. Don’t geniuses have thesauruses? Frasier was a clever, well-written show. Eventually, they fell into that classic sitcom trap and started stringing the viewer along with the Niles/Daphne story line. Instead of having two characters fall in love and get married, they stretched that shit out for seasons and insulted their audience’s intelligence with silly, unbelievable hi-jinks.
9. Mad About You – It’s a personal favorite, I loved the characters and the back and forth. It was very smart.
Look. I like Paul Reiser. I like Helen Hunt. I like dogs. I like relationships. Mad About You was a fine show. But one of the smartest shows in history? Next this guy will be telling me that Will & Grace had sharp social commentary. Also, I can just see this guy writing “repartee” again, deleting it and replacing it with “back and forth.”
10. Jeopardy – It’s about the only game show that really tries to test people’s intelligence. There’s very little luck involved, and there are few game shows like that. I don’t watch it all that much honestly, but from what I’ve seen, it tests more than knowledge, it tests intelligence too.
Game shows are probably the single dumbest genre of television ever invented, so it’s not hard to stand out among that crowd. Having said that, Jeopardy is the rare game show where your success is solely based on how much shit you know (And to a lesser extent, your mastery of that buzzer). Also, without Jeopardy, there would be no Celebrity Jeopardy. Without Celebrity Jeopardy, there would be no this:
Any list about the smartest television shows of all time that doesn’t mention The Wire is immediately rendered null and void. Especially when most of the shows mentioned on said list aren’t even as smart as Reading Rainbow. I mean, it had reading right in the title and LeVar Burton had great repartee!
Nick Adams is a comedian and author who has recently written about the 10 commandments of moviegoing and getting propositioned in New York. For more semi-interesting content, check out NickAdamsWeb.com and read his column here every other Monday.
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